Back in March 2015 I finally went to see Tony Robbins at his incredible event Unleash The Power Within. It was absolutely amazing, and I highly recommend you go, check it out just click here. One of the key concepts that I keep coming back to time and time again are his six human needs. What was fascinating was that the result of these needs could be postive or negative. And that people can become addicted to negative things if it meets their human needs.
What are the human needs? There are 6 of them:
And yes, as I said in the title of this post, this means that your business could be struggling continuously because you are letting it. Why? It meets your human needs. I know that sounds crazy, because you’re like “I want to be successful, how on earth does sabotaging my own success help me reach my human needs?”.
Well let’s have a look….The first 4 are the main ones to focus on to begin with, and if a behaviour hits 3 out of the 4 then you become addicted. Also people tend to have 2 that rise above the rest, so have a think which are the most important to you.
We like certainty in our lives. We like to know that everything is secure, and that we will be ok. Think about when you go to your favourite restaurant and pick the same thing on the menu every time. You are certain that the quality of the food and experience will be good. You know that meal is great and that you like it. Why change right?
So how can this result in negative behaviour causing our business to struggle?
Let’s say you have got your business to a particular level. You have a few clients, or your sales are at an ok level. Right here, you are 100% certain that you can deliver the services, you are 100% certain that you can cope with the current demand. You are comfortable, and to grow could be hugely uncomfortable. What if you do get more sales? What if more clients do approach you? Are you able to deal with it? Can you cope with increased demand? It would mean learning new skills or hiring staff, and thats scary stuff. It’s much more comfortable to stay in this comfortable, certain that you can deal with it, zone.
The mind loves a bit of uncertainty, well variety is the spice of life right?
For a struggling business owner, uncertainty is everywhere….
Are you going to be able to pay your bills this month?
Will you be able to meet payroll?
When will you get the next client?
What happens if clients leave?
Will you get amazing reviews? Or will the reviews be rubbish?
It’s so scary and yet, kind of exhilarating at the same time. Human need number 2 met!
What is significance? You know the guy/girl, the boss and wants to let everyone know. The topic of conversation is normally, somehow, brought back to them. Yeh this is someone who’s driver is significance, and they feel that if the topic of conversation is them then they must be important. Here is another example. The person who always goes against the grain, you know the person, the guy who when everyone is buying an iPhone, goes ands finds a Nokia 3310 to use, or instead of getting a BMW gets himself the Toyota Prius. It may not seem like it, but by not following the masses, they become the focal point for the conversation, and thus feel important.
We all want to feel important, to feel significant. But how we get that feeling is key. Is it because I held a gun up to you? I’d be really important then. Or is it because we have an incredible relationship and I know through your actions, your love, that I am important to you.
When you chat with other business owners or friends, what are you talking about?
Are you the “business owner” of the group? Are you the “struggling” business owner of the group?
When they all say, “I couldn’t do what you do, its so tough, so hard running your own business”, it makes you feel good right? When they spend time trying to help you, to give you ideas. Are you even introduced to others by saying “He owns his own business”? This attention, this calling you out, because you are different, it sets you apart, makes you feel significant, it makes you feel important.
Human need number 3 …… met!
Often this is misread by the mind, and what we perceive as love and connection is just attention. And attention is not necessarily meaningful, but if our minds think it is then it will reinforce that behaviour.
So when you’re out with friends, in fact I see this when people are networking with people they have never met before, and you talk about your “struggle” with business, what happens?
You get attention! You get sympathy. You get the nodding heads, and the agreement of those around. You get the support, the words of encouragement.
You perceive this as love/connection and that my friend is need number 4… well and truly met!
All of this together cements in your mind that it is a good thing for your business to struggle. You can hit all 4 human needs in one go by being a “struggling business owner”. As a result it becomes addictive. Your mind decides that it’s better to be in this state because all needs are met! Crazy right?
Knowing this is half the battle. Now what can you do to get out of this spiral and create the positive behaviours that will lead you and your business to great success?
CHANGE YOUR STORY
Stop talking about the struggles, talk about the wins. The good things.
Don’t give the struggle any time. Literally none. When someone asks “hows business?”, even if business is crap, respond with “it’s AWESOME”. Talk about the things that are going well in the business. Get your ‘Certainty’ from knowing that the habits you have are leading you to success. Get your variety by going after big clients, ones that are well outside your comfort zone. Stop being ‘Significant’ because of the struggle and start being ‘Significant’ because of the amazing life you are creating. Find love and connection through building incredible relationships with those around you, with other business owners, with your clients, and not because of the “struggle” but because of the success.
By doing this, and by using the 6 human needs to bring about positive change you will fly towards success.
Change Your Story!
I will be heading to Unleash The Power Within with Tony Robbins this year, April 7-10. Will you join me? Check it out now, just click here. It is one of the most amazing experiences ever. Yes you will be pushed out of your comfort zone, yes you walk on fire (and thats not the best part), and yes it will help you change your life.